


Helpless Fighters

by ivycross



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Confessions, Gift Exchange, Gift Fic, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Sickfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-01
Updated: 2016-01-01
Packaged: 2018-05-10 19:54:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,160
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5598787
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ivycross/pseuds/ivycross
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steve's down with vertigo and Danny trying to help. Only Steve's being difficult.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Helpless Fighters

**Author's Note:**

  * For [](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts).



> Written for the 2015 Winter in Hawaii gift exchange. Was beta read by theoddparticle on tumblr but all mistakes are mine.

At the sound of the cry and the crash Danny went running. He didn't have to wonder what it was. He already knew and silently cursed his partner's blatant stubbornness.

Steve sat at the bottom of the stairs, his eye shut tight, his face a mask of pain as he gripped one ankle. Truly Danny didn't know how he should feel just then. His heart went out to Steve but at the same time... "What did I tell you?"

"I'm fine," Steve answered his voice a low growl

"Uh, no, You're not. You have vertigo, Steven. That means you stay put and text me if you need something. What it does not mean is for you to try to come down the stairs by yourself!"

"I'm fine!" Steve repeated this time with his eyes open, glaring at Danny with the same look he gave smart mouthed criminals. That hurt. Danny was there to help, to make sure Steve would be okay, until his inner ear infection and the vertigo that said ear infection has brought went away. 

Only since Danny had arrived, Steve had done nothing but lash out at him, growling and glaring at him every time he did anything to assist him. He even swore at Danny when he tried to help Steve get into the shower and while Danny was no wilting flower, Steve's navy augmented tongue actually made him blush and check to make sure his ear were not bleeding. All in all, it had been a rough day for both of them and now Steve seemed to have hurt his ankle.

Danny took a deep breath and counted to ten before kneeling down. "Let me see your ankle," he said quietly. He reached out to touch the afflicted joint only to have Steve jerk back.

"I said I'm fine!"

Danny pulled back his hand and wondered how much more he could handle. Truth be told, Steve was his best friend. More than that Danny adored Steve, with a heart-driven-almost-mindless passion that he hadn't felt in years. He had no problem being there for the man, whatever he may need, but he couldn't understand why Steve was being so fucking hateful over this.

Getting back to his feet, Danny peered down at Steve silently for several seconds. Steve was no longer looking at him. His brow was furrowed and his mouth drawn up tight. He resembled a child, one that knew they were misbehaving but continued to pout anyways. 

"Can you stand?" Danny asked.

Steve huffed. "Yeah. Just give me a minute." 

When Steve did try to stand, it was a slow and awkward process. He couldn't put any weight on his ankle and that did nothing for his already skewed balance. Danny just silently moved in to help him, supporting his weight, which was not easy. Steve was close to two hundred pounds of solid muscle and in his current state, it was like trying to carry a hateful sack of sand.

Danny did manage and got Steve over to the couch where the other promptly laid down, groaning and shutting his eyes once more. Danny knelt down next to him and looked at his ankle. 

"Don't think it's broken, sprained perhaps."

“Is that you official diagnosis Doctor Williams," Steve snapped.

Danny sucked on his lips and reminded himself for the tenth time that day Steve was his friend, his ohana, and probably the love of his life. Not only that but if the situation was reversed, he knew that Steve would be at his place taking care of him. Except Danny knew that if it were the other way around he would feel guilty as hell about it and not treat his friend so poorly.

"I'm gonna get some ice for your ankle," Danny said standing. He kept his voice soft and quiet because he knew that if he didn't he might go off. 

Maybe Steve knew this because he opened his eyes to look at him and the look he gave Danny was one of unspoken guilt and apology. For a moment, Danny wondered if Steve would tell him he was sorry. The look on his face had all the tells, but when Steve opened his mouth all that came out was, "Okay. Hey. Call down to the palace and check in with Chin, would ya?"

"Yeah, sure. I can do that," Danny said. He moved away from the couch and headed into the kitchen. Pulling his phone from his pocket, he hit the speed dial for Chin. 

It was brief chat as him and Kono were on their way to question a witness but they both gave him their sympathy with Chin even saying, "If he's anything like his father, I know you have your hands full."

After discussing a few details on the case and promise to check in again later, Danny ended the call and started getting the ice for Steve's ankle. When he returned to the living room, Steve was where he left him on the couch. His eyes were shut tight, his face scrunched up. He looked as he was trying not to cry.

Danny walked softly and gently placed the bag of ice on Steve's ankle noting that the other had already placed a pillow under it. "How that feel?" he asked.

"Cold," Steve said. The edge was gone from his voice now and Danny wondered what was going on in Steve's mind.

Danny reached out and patted his leg. "How are you holding up, buddy?"

For several seconds Steve said nothing, but then he sighed, opening one eye to look up at the Danny. "I..." he started but then stopped frowning. "Danny, will you sit with me?"

"Yeah, I can do that," Danny said and he pulled one of the chairs closer to the end of the couch. For a long time, they sat in silence, Danny watching his friend lay quietly on the couch. Steve's eyes shut like he was trying to not see at all ever again.

Then Steve spoke. "Danno?"

"Yes, Steven?"

"Have you ever had vertigo?"

"Once. Back in college. Came with a migraine. It was fucking terrible."

"So you know what this feels like?"

Danny nodded and shrugged. "Yeah. It's awful. You're dizzy. You're nauseous. You need help taking a leak..."

Steve let out a humorless laugh. "Yeah. It makes you feel helpless."

Danny's ears perked up. Steve wasn't wrong. You felt helpless as hell with vertigo and it could drive someone crazy. Someone like Steve who wasn't used to feeling helpless. Who fought to always maintain control of everything he touched. Albeit, he was nowhere near as bad as he used to be, but he still refused to let Danny drive the Camaro and that was bad enough. Steve's less than stellar attitude was making sense when Danny thought of it like that.

"You know what it means for a SEAL when he's helpless?" Steve's voice pulled Danny out of his thoughts.

"What?"

"It means he's probably going to die."

Steve's tone gave Danny pause. It was heartbreaking and in that moment, Danny wondered how many times Steve thought that he would never make it home.

"Steve, you're not going to die from Vertigo unless you fall down the stairs again and break your neck," Danny said, keeping his tone light.

It didn't seem to help as Steve just laid there quiet. After a few minutes, he said: "I know that Danny, but…You don't know what it's like. You don't know what it feels like to even have that thought pass through your head. And you're in the thick of things, so you can't process it. You can't rationalize it. You just have to plow through and hope that you're wrong."

"Steve..." Danny's words died on his tongue. He didn't know what to say to that. What could he say? "I'm sorry." It was a start.

Steve let out some more mirthless laughter. "You should be."

Danny sat back, his mouth open in indignation. "Um, what? Excuse you? Where in the hell did that come from?" Hewas no longer trying to be quiet. His voice rose with each word, his hand gesturing wildly.

Steve just laughed, not a quiet mirthless one like before but a real laugh. That only made Danny glare at him even more. "What is so funny, Steven?"

"You," Steve answered still chuckling. "Us. Me." He sighed and opened the other eye, so that now he looked at Danny fully, his expression soft. "You always make me feel helpless, Danno."

Danny was struck dumb. He stared at Steve, his mouth open. "What do you mean by that?" His tone wasn't as harsh but there was an edge to it.

"Just that," Steve answered. "You make me feel helpless. It's weird because I know you don't mean to and it doesn't make sense, but..." He closed both eyes again and sighed. "This was not how I wanted this conversation to go."

Danny's brow furrowed. What conversation? His mind ran wild with a million different ideas. Ones where Steve told him that he wasn't needed anymore, or that he was being displaced on the team. 

Things that would kill Danny to hear and he started gearing his mind down for. If Steve was going to pick this moment to tell him to kiss off, then Danny would take it like a man. He might punch Steve in his stupidly attractive face, vertigo or no vertigo, but he would do so in very manly fashion. Then he would leave and hole himself up in his house forever, barring the weekends he had Grace because then she would be the only thing he had left in the world to really care about.

Steve had gone quiet again and Danny waited. It was an awful thing too. He wanted to rant and rail, stand up waving his hand about, demand that Steve fessed up right then to whatever he was thinking, but he just sat gripping the arms of his chair and waited.

"I love you, Danny."

Danny blinked. What in the hell? "You've told me that before, you big goof." He smiled when he said it but inside he was shaking. Steve had told him before, but it either had been in a joking fashion or after harrowing life or death situation. To hear him say it now was unsettling, in that Danny couldn't read Steve at the moment. This wasn't life or death and he didn't think it was a joke...

"Yeah I know, but…I mean it Danno. I love you. I'm in love with you and..."

"And?" There was a lump in Danny's throat and he tried to swallow it down. Only it wasn't going away. It seemed to be making it hard to breathe just then. He didn't imagine that Steve would ever reciprocate his feelings and the very idea that maybe just maybe the man felt something for him too. Well, to say Danny was over the moon would be an understatement.

Steve opened his mouth again, but he suddenly he looked tired and unsure. Not a good look for Steve and one that Danny had only seen a few times. "You know what Danny? I'm kinda tired so I think I might try to sleep. Let me know if Chin calls in about that case." And with that Steve rolled over on the couch, his back now facing Danny.

Danny couldn't believe it. He was so close and then nothing. Suddenly he felt tired himself and empty. He said nothing as he stood, walking out the living room toward the back door that led out the beach. He sat out in the sand starting at the water until he lost track of time and Steve texted him asking for a glass of water.

~*~

Two weeks later and Steve was back on his feet. In fact, he was running at top speed making everyone else scramble to keep up with him in the process. Danny especially. 

Nothing was said about their previous conversation. Steve did apologize for acting like an ass and Danny just smiled. "I would have been worried if you had acted like anything else." To which Steve just laughed and patted his shoulder.

Really things seemed normal except they weren't. Not for Danny. He still felt shaken inside at Steve's possible confession and it was driving him crazy. He refused to say anything, though. He couldn't say for sure that Steve meant any of it and didn't want to ask in case Steve just stared at him blankly and remarked: "I was sick Danny!" Yeah, he didn't want that.

So he contented himself to keeping busy, letting the idea of what might have been sometimes carrying him throughout the day. It was better than nothing and he still had Steve's friendship. That could be enough he figured. No point in being greedy.

Now it was Saturday and one without Grace, so he was left at home alone, staring unseeing at a baseball game, the beer in his hands getting warm. He needed to do something. Maybe he could go to out and... What? See the sights like a common tourist? 

He had already seen the best of the island, thanks to Steve, Kono and Chin, the three of them taking him out to the see the places that tourists missed and only locals knew about it. He could so some work on the house? Or something in the yard? Maybe plant a tree? 

Yeah. That would be a good project and one he had been wanting to do anyways. Only he was going to get Steve to help so he didn't mess up his knee dragging a sapling around. So he was back a square one.

There was a knock on his door pulling him from his thoughts and he stood to see who it was. Who it was, was Steve, looking sheepish holding a six-pack of Long Boards and a pizza.

"Hey," he said when Danny opened the door.

 "Hey," Danny answered eying him for a moment.

"So, I was at home, not really doing much and I thought I would stop by. I brought beer and pizza," Steve said and wasn't that just like him. He had nothing better to do, so he would bother Danny because everyone knew Danny had no life.

"Yeah, I can see that," Danny answered but made no move to let Steve in. While at work he carried on like things were the same because let's face it, they were, but he didn't want to do that here in his home. It was his  safe place from having to pretend that Steve didn't just say I love you in a non-joking way. It would take more than beer and pizza for him to give that up.

Steve seemed to know this too. He chewed on his lip for a second and sighed. "I wanted to talk. Can I come in?"

He wanted to talk? Danny shrugged his shoulders and stepped back, allowing Steve room to walk inside. He closed the door and watched as Steve moved toward the couch, setting the beer and pizza down on the coffee table.

"So watching baseball?" Steve hadn't sat down but shoved his hand in his pockets facing him.

Danny looked at him, his arms crossed over his chest. He didn't want to do this, engage in small talk, but Steve seemed determined.

"Who's playing?"

"The Yankees and The Braves," Danny answered his voice deadpan.

Steve gave a nod, sucking on his lips. Neither of them said anything for a while, both of them staring at each other. Then Steve broke.

"Danny, I meant what I said." Steve ducked his head as he spoke, one hand running through his hair.

"And that was?" Danny wasn't going to make this easy. Oh hell no. Not after the last two weeks of having Steve's words running through his mind. Not after seeing Steve roll over on that couch in his head time and time again. He was going to make Steve work for this.

Steve sighed, his shoulders dropping a bit. "When I said I love you… I meant that." He paused looking around the room uncertain before he continued. "And that you make feel helpless."

Danny narrowed his eyes. "How do I make you feel helpless, Steven?"

Steve gave an exasperated huff, puffing his cheeks out as he blew out a breath. "You just do. You're doing it right now! I mean… I'm trying to talk to you, which by the way you are always on my ass about doing and you're giving me the cold shoulder."

Danny's eye went wide. "Cold Shoulder?" He uncrossed his arms and went over to Steve, a finger raised. "No no, my friend. This is not the cold shoulder. This is me trying to give you a chance to not be a complete dick, which you are failing at by the way. You spent a whole day treating me like shit when I was trying to help you and then you turn a one-eighty on me and tell me you love me. Which is some of the most manipulative -"

"Manipulative?" Steve's eyes bulged out, his teeth bared.

"Yes, Manipulative. That was bullshit Steve and not fair. Especially when you decided that you didn't want to talk anymore."

"I was sick, Danny! I didn't feel good and I knew I needed rest."

"No! You knew that you had put your foot in your mouth and was looking for an out!" Both men glared at one another their fury radiating off them. This was more familiar ground. They had been fighting since day one and it was something Danny could handle. 

He didn't know why but he liked fighting with Steve, which was a strange and twisted thing. But Steve made it easy and it was fun… 

Okay, not fun but passionate. They both fought with passion and conviction, and when it was over it never changed how they saw each other. At the end of the day, they were still close and sometimes closer. 

That was something Danny loved. When he had fought with Rachel, it just drove them apart more and more until one day she was gone. Not with Steve and it made Danny so happy. So what did that say about him? Just where was this even going?

"Danny," Steve said pursing his lips. "Okay, you're not wrong."

"You mean I'm right," Danny supplied smiling.

"No. It just means that you not wrong about me looking for an out. I started talking and I realized I wasn't ready…So yeah.  I took the easy way out and that's what I mean when I say you make feel helpless. You make me feel a lot of things and that makes me feel helpless because..." He took a deep breath. "I don't know what to do with it all."

Danny lowered his finger. "Normal people talk about it," he said.

"You don't make that easy."

"What does that mean?"

"It means," Steve licked his lips his eyes darting around the room. "That I want to talk to you and tell you these things, but nothing comes out. I want to but I think if I do, I could lose my friend. I don't want that Danny. You're the closest person in my life right now and if I did lose you I..."

Steve frowned,  his eyes downcast. It broke Danny's heart. It would be so easy to just let this go... Only it wouldn't. They had started this mess. If they didn't finish it, it would backfire on them.

"You're not going to lose me, Steve," he said. "Unless you keep this bullshit up. Then yeah, you just might." Right then, Danny saw fear flash across Steve's face. It was a nasty threat, but Danny wasn't above playing dirty right then.

"It's not bullshit. You know that I don't like to talk about this stuff. It's doesn't come as easy to me as it does you."

"So what? You started this. You finish it!"

And there was Steve's constipated face. The man didn't like being told what to do and liked to fix things his own way. The thing was Danny knew that Steve would never fix this because it was about emotions. He knew how Steve handled emotions. He didn't. He just boxed them up in one of the many compartments in his brain and let them stew. Well, he wasn't having that. Not this time. For his own sanity.

"Well, I'm waiting," he said and stared right into Steve's eyes challenging him.

To his relief, Steve took his challenge. Steve squared his shoulders and grabbed Danny by the arms. Danny didn't get a chance to ask what he was doing before he felt the man's lips on his own. Okay, this wasn't what Danny thought would happen but he wasn't going to complain. The kiss sent white hot heat down his spine and he thought he would melt into a puddle.

When it was over, far too soon for Danny's taste, he stood there staring at Steve who seemed to be waiting. "Is that it?" he asked.

"What? No. That was.. part of it. I want to do that because..."

"You've wanted to for a while?" Danny supplied.

Steve's shoulder slumped once more but this time, it wasn't in defeat or frustration. He looked relaxed and surer of himself. "Yeah," he said and smiled.

Danny couldn't help but smile back. "That's good because I've wanted you to do that for a while."

The smiled dropped from Steve's face, his brows furrowed. "Really?"

"Yeah. So you love me and I love you, so what now?"

Steve seemed to think and then he smiled. "You love me?" He grinned like an idiot and Danny didn't know if he wanted to kiss him or punch him.

"I'm not repeating myself, Steve." He kept his voice stern but the smile was still there. Steve looked to be on cloud nine. He turned from Danny, his movements more like himself and plopped down on the couch grabbing a beer.

"I don't know. You wanna move in with me?"

"Move in with you?" This was going in yet another direction and Danny's head reeled. "I thought I made you feel helpless?"

Steve looked up at him, his head tilted to one side. "You did but I wasn't sure what would happen if I told you how I feel. Now I know and..." He shrugged. "I don't feel that way anymore. Problem solved. So you wanna move in tomorrow?"

Danny opened his mouth to shout but he shut it again and sighed. What was the point? In the end, they were both getting what they wanted. He sat down next to Steve, tucking into the man's side as Steve slipped an arm around him. 

"I'm not moving in with you…Not yet. We date first and see where things take us."

Steve snorted as he sipped his beer. "Why? We'll be fine. We’ve gotten this far."

"But what if we fight and break up? Where does that leave me?"

Another shrug. "We fight all the time. It's a part of who we are." He sipped his beer thoughtfully and added. "You know I kinda like it."

"Because you're insane?"

"No," Steve retorted. "Because I know that I can fight with you. Because at the end of the day, you're still going to be there and that means a lot to me."

So Steve felt the same way. They were both crazy and while Danny wanted to argue this, to point out everything that could go wrong and lead to their demise as a couple, he didn't. He already knew that it would work out because no matter what at the end of the day, they would still have each other. That's all that mattered. 

Danny smiled and snuggled closer to Steve, enjoying something he had only experienced once and had fantasized about for years. "I'm not moving in. Not tomorrow anyways."

"That's fine. We can do it next Saturday. That way there is time to clean, pack and get the team to help."

There was no way he was going to win this so Danny just sighed. "You know, I think I liked you better when you were helpless."

Steve just smiled and turned his attention to the game. So did Danny but his brain kept whirling away. Just then he felt helpless, to this man and his charms and had since the day they met. 

He wondered if he should tell Steve. He decided against it. That could wait for another day. Maybe after some anniversary in the far flung future, because while Danny worried about all the things that could go wrong, he already knew Steve would not let this go without a fight. It was a good thing they liked fighting with each other.


End file.
